Am I enough? I hesitate
I look to others to validate
I am enough, say I so clear
then stop and look around in fear
Lest I hear the voices speak
And declare that I’m but weak.
No choice I have. No power here
Say the voices with a sneer
Inside my head they run amok
Beat me down. Keep me stuck
To wallow in the less-than mess
Wreaking havoc, breeding stress.
War does wage inside my head
At times I wake up full of dread
What if they shall rule my life
Creating heartache, causing strife?
The chatter is from long ago
Their beginnings I no longer know
Reared me harshly through the years
Force feeding me my deepest fears
Kept me down, Made me small
My soul held hostage in their squall.
I’ve borrowed them over time
through the years, made them mine
They were lent from others old
Who did not want to see me bold
Shackling me with musts and shoulds
Instead of nurturing with cans and coulds
Tamping out the light within
Viewing bliss as wasteful sin.
The voices borrowed are not mine
yet kept them with me past their prime
no longer may they live with me
brittle, worn; obsolete
Be gone the voices of times gone by
No more will I believe your lies
Of less than, failing and self- deceit
Of brutal cruelty and self-defeat.
I am enough!. I say to me
No longer ruled by insecurity
The voices are silent, instead is mine
Compassionate, loving, soothing, kind
This is the only sound I hear
My soul’s true self I hold dear
I say – I am Enough. no less, I vow
My newfound voice sustains me now.
©nuance/mjjs
nuance 